Amuse Me - Ed and Roy
by Batsutousai
Summary: Somehow, Ed gets landed with the job of cheering Roy Mustang up and getting him back to work.


**Title:** _Amuse Me ~ Ed & Roy_  
**Fandom:** _Fullmetal Alchemist_  
**Author:** Batsutousai  
**Rating:** T  
**Warnings:** minor crack, some angst of the Roy variety  
**Summary:** Somehow, Ed gets landed with the job of cheering Roy Mustang up and getting him back to work.  
**Disclaim Her:** This story is based on characters and situations created and owned by Arakawa Hiromu and various publishers. No money is being made and no copyright or trademark infringement is intended.

**A/N:** From a list of prompts on tumblr as a response to the prompt given to me by ms-ravenheart. The prompt was **Amuse me. Ed & Roy **

You'll have to forgive me if they're a bit OoC, everyone. It's been a couple years since I watched this show last, and all my stuff is in storage. ^.^"

-0-

"Lieutenant Hawkeye sent me," Ed said, leaning against the tree under which Mustang was sitting. According to Hawkeye, the colonel had stepped entirely too calmly from the office after getting word that Falman was in hospital after some undercover mission or another Mustang had him running inside the city. Ed didn't know the specifics – it was better for all of them that he didn't, he understood that – but Hawkeye seemed really concerned over more than the pile of papers Mustang had left behind. Ed really didn't know _why_ she was so concerned, since it was hardly news that the colonel would sneak out, and he _looked_ normal.

"I'm surprised you bothered," Mustang said, monotone, not looking up from whatever held his attention on the empty track.

Ed tensed briefly before forcing himself to relax; he'd never heard Mustang sound so...dead before. Gate, cheering people up wasn't really his area of expertise, especially not people he would usually give his remaining limbs to see brought down a peg or two. But Hawkeye had asked, and Ed understood being upset at seeing someone you were expected to protect hurt. He let out a sigh and prodded the colonel's side with the tip of his boot, being gentler than he would have otherwise. "There's this new Aerugo restaurant opened over by the train station that's pretty good, you know. I wanted to try it out, but Al wouldn't let me. Something about turning my report in in a timely manner?"

Mustang snorted. "That would be a first." He sounded a bit more lively, at least, and Ed took that as a good sign.

"Yeah. And, what do you know, the first time I try to behave myself and put work before food, you're out of the office, moping on the grass." Ed poked him with his boot again. "You owe me food from that restaurant, Colonel Bastard."

Mustang looked up then, and there was still a hint of pain held deep in the dark eyes – it was only Ed's long familiarity with his superior that let him spot it – but he had a smirk twisting his lips and a familiar glint of superiority in his eyes. "I might have done, too. But there you go, putting your stomach before work."

"I did not!" Ed snapped, immediately irritated. He _hadn't_!

Mustang's smirk widened. "What's my name, Fullmetal?"

Oh. _That's_ what he was complaining about. Bastard. "Colonel Bastard Mustang, Sir!" Ed called out and hurriedly straightened and held his hand to his forehead in an approximation of a salute.

Mustang choked, then burst out laughing, knocking his head back against the trunk of the tree and not even seeming to notice.

Ed smirked a bit and leaned down. "So, Aerugo restaurant? You can blame the continued delay of your work on me."

Mustang snorted, calming down from his burst of humour, but still smiling. "I often blame my delay on you, pipsqueak."

Ed's eyes widened, torn somewhere between disbelief and amusement. "Wha– Did you ju– WHO ARE YOU CALLING–!?"

Mustang laughed again and stood, clamping a hand over Ed's mouth to shut him up. "Alright, Fullmetal, let's go fill your stomach. And probably empty my account, knowing how you eat."

Ed glowered at the man, but allowed himself to be led towards the car pool. "I should empty it. Bastard."

Mustang snorted again.

Ed wasn't the least bit surprised when they made a stop by the hospital on their way back from eating.

..


End file.
